They say, its always darkest before the dawn. And this is the darkest series I have done so far. It is cathartic for sure, digging right into the pain, uncovering it’s messy nature. So in order to get over this mess, to be able to rise from the abyss all over again, it is necessary to go through all of this.
I was born in pain. Pain is flowers blooming all the time. It’s always there, even when you don’t see it. I grew up with pain as my foundation and it shaped me into what I am today but sometimes people have to wonder about how much of a role does a flower play in making one… whole?
As pain flowers bloom,
in the sun and in the rain,
in the day and in night.
Every time I look at them
they seem to change.
They never grow dull or tired of blooming, as if by some magic force that’s always there when you need it most.
Happiness is fragile. I imagined it to be a tender blossom and did not dare to touch its buds. I marveled at its lightness like it was not real. But what is real anyways? It’s all in your mind, after all.
There is a hole where my breath used to be. I have nothing more to lose, just the emptiness in there.
I love this poem by Bukowski:
in the sun and in the rain
and in the day and in the night
pain is a flower
pain is flowers
blooming all the time.
― Charles Bukowski